We have to feel life.  I heard that on Grey’s Anatomy.  I’m sure I can back it up with a bible verse but for now it’s the word of Dr. Grey.  It’s true because I’ve done both.  I’ve felt life and I’ve also shielded myself from life.  

No matter, either way, we are going to feel and have emotions.  My belief is that God made us that way.  And yet we try to overcome  — when it’s not time to overcome — all for the sake of time.

Without holding hard feelings against a man who said, just a few short days after a funeral, “We must move on,” I say his timing was off.  The death was a shock; maybe not to some but to many.  We all have to feel life and I’d add to Dr. Grey’s words — we have to feel death.

Marriages go through tough times and we smile and say I love you.  We’re afraid to discuss, verbalize, and be honest  because we’re taught to forgive and move on.  Vulnerability sets in and we turn to friends, counselors, and lovers to discuss what we won’t discuss with a mate.

In our fast paced world, now more than ever, we just move on.  How much do we leave behind?  

Those feelings will come out.  We have to feel.  Our bodies were made to feel.  Pinch your arm.  Did it hurt?  Yes, it did.  But maybe you say no because you, because I, have become conditioned to “work through it.” We get to a point where we say, “No big deal.  I can handle it.”

What if we stop, feel the pain, express the anger, discuss discouragement, and confess our wrongs and stand for rights?  What if we do feel life and actually live in the reality of  life instead of  skirting issues, avoiding, and shouldering the pain?  

We all have to learn to live and die well.  That doesn’t mean we have a smile on our face through it all.  It should be that we deal honestly, put pride aside, be the people we are made to be.  

I’m thankful that when I  have to deal with the feelings of life that are not good ones, I can be encouraged by people who understand.  Be the encourager that does not give a pat answer.  Be the person that says, if it’s true, that you understand their feelings and it is OK to feel life and death.   

I think we will all be healthier for it.